Category: Criminal Capers


Sherlock Holmes and Watson are lying on the grass looking up at the stars. Watson looks at the night sky ands says “looking at the millions of starts, millions of light years away, with the possibility of millions of planets some of which must be similar in some way to Earth, what do you deduce ?”

Sherlock thinks for a moment and then states. “The only thing one can say with absolute certainty, is that somebody’s stolen our tent”


There was a magician called Stu

Whose wife tried to kill, yes it’s true

So she sawed him in half

Which was a bit daft

As now there’s not one Stu but two


As the murderer added soil to his allotment, the plot thickened


I got 10 years for something I didn’t do.

I didn’t wear gloves


Will the person who took the left turning off the M4 kindly put it back.


Police notice: Wool has been stolen from several shops in the area, we believe the burglar may be following some kind of pattern.

Amazon, The Laughter Librarys Prefered Advertiser


What do you get if you call 666 ?

Three policemen standing on their heads


What do you get if you cross Dracula and Al Capone?

A Fangster


Gangster 1 to Gangster 2

“Help me saw the legs of these beds… The boss wants us to lie low for while”