Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the dance ?
Because he had no body to go with
Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the dance ?
Because he had no body to go with
Sherlock Holmes and Watson are lying on the grass looking up at the stars. Watson looks at the night sky ands says “looking at the millions of starts, millions of light years away, with the possibility of millions of planets some of which must be similar in some way to Earth, what do you deduce ?”
Sherlock thinks for a moment and then states. “The only thing one can say with absolute certainty, is that somebody’s stolen our tent”
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Mary
Mary Who ?
Merry Christmas
Why are Christmas trees bad at sewing ?
They always drop their needles
Who delivers presents to baby sharks ?
Santa Jaws
There was a magician called Stu
Whose wife tried to kill, yes it’s true
So she sawed him in half
Which was a bit daft
As now there’s not one Stu but two
There was a dog breeder called Daniel
Who wed a frog breeder called Hazel
They went mad one night
And to their delight
Ended up with the first croaker spaniel
I used to be conceited but now I’m perfect.
I haven’t slept for three days
Because eight hours is enough
I’m so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes shut