Tag: food

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My son thinks he’s a chicken, we would take him to the doctors but we need the eggs !

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Sam: Is that a cabbage patch on your allotment ?

Alex: Yes, I’m trying to give up cabbages

Amazon, The Laughter Librarys Prefered Advertiser

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Customer: I don’t believe this is rabbit pie

Waiter: Why not ?

Customer: Because its got hairs in it.

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Customer: “£3000.00 for vegetable soup !!!!!”

Waiter: “Well it was 24 carrot sir”

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Woman: If you were my husband I would poison your food

Man: If you were my wife I would eat it

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All drinking water in this workplace has been personally passed by the management

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My wife wanted a birthday meal whilst listening to string quartet.

So I bought her a burger at the Wimbledon doubles final.

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Why does studying history keep you regular ?

Because it fills you full of dates.

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What happens when you play table tennis with a rotten egg?

You don’t get much of a ping, but you sure get a pong